January 6th, 2010

Today I woke up at my friend’s apartment, hair looking less than what I would call decent (it is taking time to get used to this Shampoo-Free lifestyle, therefore, it’s stiff, frizzy, and uncontrollable). I put on my slippers, grabbed my stuff, and walked back to my house. And as I did, I passed two teenage-ish boys I see often, standing outside their apartment, snickering. I walked passed, and they rudely pointed out how “nappy” my hair was to one another, but loud enough where they knew I could hear (who does that?!), and made some other comment that shouldn’t have been said as I opened the gate and shut it not-so-gently behind me. They laughed louder and made other pointless comments.

To my great delight, however, I shut the gate and tuned them out only to be greeted with a smile and a hug from a loving friend of my mine who unintentionally reassured me that my lack of physical beauty at that moment did not negate who I was and that I was loved.

I know this will be difficult, at times, because the world will get in the way. They’ll snicker and laugh and make rude comments about my appearance and make me feel insignificant and insecure. But this isn’t about what they think. In fact, it’s just the opposite. It’s to get over caring about what they think and settle in the truth of being comfortable in my own skin, my own makeupless skin and nappy shampooless hair.

I can live with their snickers and rude remarks, knowing that I will always be, just seconds later, greeted with a smile and hug in reassurance that I am loved. Whether it be from a real human being or the soft whisper from my Father in Heaven, I will know it. I will know it.